


The Discord-er of No Quarter

by cohockcharge



Category: Shovel Knight
Genre: Chatlogs, Gen, I don't know how people tag things on here this is VERY MUCH my first rodeo, it's an order of no quarter chatfic, the knights are an absolute mess but all in different clashing ways
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 07:52:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27659774
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cohockcharge/pseuds/cohockcharge
Summary: Welcome, my knights, to the Discord-er of No Quarter! (Version 3... let's try to keep this one active for at least a week before angering Specter Knight, shall we?)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 30





	1. welcome, knights!... again.

**Author's Note:**

> this is exactly what it says on the tin. if you're wondering how all this modern stuff exists in shovel knight's setting, please remember that tinker knight has a mech.

Welcome, my knights, to the Discord-er of No Quarter! (Version 3... let's try to keep this one active for at least a week before angering Specter Knight, shall we?)

~RULES~  
1 - Specter Knight is the only one of you with the privileges afforded to moderators. This means what he says GOES. _No argument._  
2 - Friendly/passive-aggressive teasing is allowed, but outright arguments are not permitted under any circumstances. I don't care what you feel they've done to stain your honour, you are colleagues. _Act like it._  
3 - You are not permitted to ping me under any circumstances. If I find your conversation interesting enough to bother with, I will already be paying attention to it. You may, however, ping any of your fellow knights for any reason.  
4 - All of your physical and mental weaknesses must be listed ( _truthfully._ ) in the channel #weak-points. This is non-negotiable. Consider this your equivalent of a trust fall.  
5 - Work-related discussions must be kept in the relevant channels. If you are found asking for help in any unrelated channel, you will not get it. In fact, I may make your task more difficult, just for fun. You wouldn't want that, would you?  
6 - No questioning my decision to make Specter Knight the only one of you with moderator status. I am aware he has nuked multiple previous versions of this server on a whim. He's still a better choice than any of you.  
7 - I can read EVERYTHING you say in here. Keep that in mind.  
8 - Make sure to ping Specter Knight in any topics you feel would make him particularly miserable. You will be able to find these in the pinned messages of the #weak-points channel.

Make sure to introduce yourselves, and keep the atmosphere here as dark and oppressive as it should be. :enchantresslaugh:


	2. every day I get emails.

la rose de la ciel 🌹 #6969: ah, life is painful... every day, I receive emails...  
Treasure Knight #9999: It would be nice if you actually ANSWERED those emails for once. I am attempting to get in touch with you for a REASON. - Treasure Knight  
❄️ #4246: hmph. don't.  
Treasure Knight #9999: I'm sorry? I was under the impression we were all supposed to be pulling our weight in this endeavour, yet neither of you will even speak to your colleagues? Pathetic. - Treasure Knight  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: YEAH IM WITH TREASURE ON THIS ONE, YOU GUYS SUCK! SOME OF US ARE ACTUALLY DOING THINGS HERE, YOU CANT JUST EXPECT PRODUCTIVE FOLK TO COVER FOR YOU.  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: ofc you agree with him. simp.  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: SHUT THE FUCK UP NERD  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: _@dont talk to me_ time to be miserable, hee!  
dont talk to me #4213: UGH  
dont talk to me #4213: _workplace discussion._  
Treasure Knight #9999: Before you attempt to stop us, we are in the relevant channel for this, though Propeller wasn't necessarily using it in good faith. - Treasure Knight  
la rose de la ciel 🌹 #6969: ah, mon ami, I was simply erring on the side of caution! a sensible thing to do in present company, no?  
dont talk to me #4213: shut the fuck up i literally do not care. i am only here because of the rule regarding topics i hate. leave me alone.  
la rose de la ciel 🌹 #6969: fair enough :/  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Wait, you guys are getting emails?  
Treasure Knight #9999: ... -Treasure Knight  
❄️ #4246: no.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will admit I'm a little biased against propeller because the flying machine consistently makes my life hell, but I, too, feel the pain of Getting Emails, so I can give him that. hopefully my limited knowledge of french didn't fail me for his nickname


	3. tier list

dont talk to me #4213: anyway, ive decided my purpose in life now ive finished recruiting all of you is to bother king knight whenever he speaks. keeps him humble.  
dont talk to me #4213: its a tough job, interacting with him and all, but someones gotta do it.  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: your sacrifice is appreciated, and your impeccable work ethic should be praised.  
dont talk to me #4213: thank you. i really try so hard, every day.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: ALRIGHT! That's it. I've finally snapped. I'm going to start ranking you.  
dont talk to me #4213: oh, no, hes ranking us! whatever will we do, im so scared, etc. whatever.  
la rose de la ciel 🌹 #6969: If I may ask, what categories do you intend to rank us in?  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: _All._  
❄️ #4246: watch out everybody. he's making a tier list.  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: i hope i'm the bottom tier!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: SILENCE, ALL OF YOU! Now, let me begin...  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Of course, I come in first place in every regard!  
dont talk to me #4213: cool, the most predictable result on there. can you skip to the interesting stuff so we can just fight about it like we always do?  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: _Every ranking has meaning and thought put into it!_ Although I suppose _you_ wouldn't understand that, since your life is entirely free of both thought and meaning.  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: wow, can people double die? because I think he just killed specter again, hee!  
dont talk to me #4213: ... alright, recovered from that devastating blow. if you ever speak to me like that again, i will ban you without hesitation, so dont get cute with me like you actually know what words mean.  
❄️ #4246: can we get back to the tier list? tier list was funny.  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: why do _you_ of all people know what a tier list is? you live in the ruins of a crashed ship and don't own anything more high tech than a campfire...  
❄️ #4246: TIER LIST. NOW.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Uh! Here we go, Very Large Man Who Could Easily Crush Me Should I Displease You!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Polar Knight actually has taken second place on here, due almost entirely to him sending me pictures of his dogs on request, and also because he's the only one of you peons who will actually listen to me talk about the proper care and feeding of rats. Take notes!  
dont talk to me #4213: oh, cant you hear my note taking? my pencil scratching?  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: I feel like that was intended to insult me, but no, I cannot. This is a text based medium.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Moving on, in third place we have Tinker!  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: aw beans.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: His placement on here is due largely to his understanding of his place in the world - NOT challenging my authority - but I will also mention his tendency to say incredibly threatening things out of nowhere! Delightfully ominous, keep it up, Tinker!  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: if you really liked me you'd have made me a bottom tier  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: That makes no sense at all. Why would I rank you lower if I liked you? Anyway, moving on...  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: In fourth place! We have... Treasure Knight! Your politeness and professionalism are what got you this far, but I had to dock points for that time you grabbed me by the feet, threw me into a wall, and called me 'worthless trash'. Better luck next time!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: He... hasn't answered that. Should I be worried?  
dont talk to me #4213: in general? yes. about treasure knight? no. hes just busy doing paperwork today.  
dont talk to me #4213: _our_ paperwork.  
dont talk to me #4213: honestly you should consider that in his ranking.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: I won't, and your input is not appreciated.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Anyway, fifth place goes to Propeller Knight! Your class and style are indeed enviable, but you also tried to kill me over a _rose_. that you kept in a _treasure chest_. That is actually ridiculous. We can't just be letting you do things like that.  
la rose de la ciel 🌹 #6969: I object most strongly to this! You should not have been poking around in chests that don't belong to you in the first place, you glittering goon!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Words can be hurtful, watch what you say.  
la rose de la ciel 🌹 #6969: Oh, if that is the case then I will not hold back! You know what? I'm _glad_ your path through my fleet forced you to go through the Ladder Factory.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: I...  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Well if that's how you feel, then I'm knocking you down a place! Mole Knight is now in 5th place.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: You may live in a dirty hole and your manners leave something to be desired, but at least you don't employ _hover meanies!_  
dont talk to me #4213: seconded.  
la rose de la ciel 🌹 #6969: _What do all of you have against my crew!_  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Not all of us can fly!  
dont lie to me #4213: i am actually shaking with rage just thinking about all the pits they pushed me into. i hope all their propellers break irreparably.  
la rose de la ciel 🌹 #6969: You are all so mean...  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: I think you'll find _they're_ the meanies. That's why they're called that.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Now, I intend to reveal second-to-last and last together, since it would be redundant to pretend that last place was a mystery after ranking everyone else.  
dont talk to me #4213: its already redundant to pretend that last place is a mystery. who else could it _possibly_ be?  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: If you haven't been keeping track, it's between you and Plague Knight now.  
dont talk to me #4213: im... not going to answer that.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Good! So, in last place... We have... (Drum roll, please!)...  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: hee, the suspense is killing me! I wonder who it could be!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Specter Knight! Plague Knight, you tried _valiantly_ to reach this spot, but for all your tricks and devilish concoctions, there was really nothing you could do.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: He's really just... The worst. I have nothing more to say. It's everything about him.  
dont talk to me #4213: for tinkers sake, im going to pretend i was hoping for this.  
dont talk to me #4213: YESSS! LAST PLACE! THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANTED! IM SO GLAD IM THE WORST!  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: thx for trying, specter... still miffed about it though...  
dont talk to me #4213: honestly, i am pretty happy with this. means my overwhelming hate is actually getting through to him. its nice to know im having an effect.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Anyway, that was the definitive Order of No Quarter ranking! Thank you all for listening! As my reward for first place, I'm issuing a decree that you all have to start using tone indicators when talking to me. Legally, you have to let me know if you're poking fun at me, so I can retaliate.  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: you know, I was actually going to suggest using tone indicators, but now I'm strangely opposed to the idea... could it be because of the person suggesting it? no, hee hee, surely not!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Well, it's a Royal Decree, so you have no choice in the matter. Better get over it!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Oh, and Polar? I'd like to see a picture of one of your dogs now, if you please!  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you ever just make stupid tier lists with your friends? you should. it's hilarious. this one got really long actually. I'm not sure if all the chapters will be this long, but I'm going to start aiming for that.


	4. ooo girl

Treasure Knight #9999: ooh girl something something an electric eel  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: WH  
Treasure Knight #9999: My apologies. One of my employees had my phone. - Treasure Knight  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: OH RIGHT  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: KEEP A BETTER HOLD OF YOUR PHONE NEXT TIME GENIUS  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: wait...  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: wait, none of us use phones!  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: our communication software is in our helmets!  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: i would know, i was the one who installed it!  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: what are you hiding, big guy? :suspiciousglare:  
Treasure Knight #9999: Um - Treasure Knight  
Treasure Knight #9999: Nothing - Treasure Knight  
Treasure Knight #9999: Suspicious, aren't you - Treasure Knight  
dont talk to me #4213: he was listening to music and singing along, and it got picked up by text to speech.  
Treasure Knight #9999: HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?!? - Treasure Knight  
dont talk to me #4213: look behind you, idiot.  
Treasure Knight #9999: WHY ARE YOU IN MY SHIP  
Treasure Knight #9999: GET OUT OF MY SHIP  
Treasure Knight #9999: NOW!!!!!!!  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: I think you broke him...  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: HE STOPPED SIGNING OFF... :0  
The One You Kneel For #0000: Oh, this server was _definitely_ worth making! I haven't laughed so hard in a very long while indeed! :enchantresslaugh:  
dont talk to me #4213: im going to delete that emote.  
The One You Kneel For #0000: You do that, and I delete _you._

_\-----------------------------------------------_

dont talk to me #4213: yay whos ready for another round of things i know about my coworkers that my coworkers dont want me to know (and neither do i)!  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: ooh, ooh, let me guess!  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: nobody! because that's a _terrible_ name for a bit! I'm really good at these, hee, give me another one!  
dont talk to me #4213: well i _was_ going to tell everyone that treasure knight commissioned a new song for the iron whale, but now im thinking i should tell everyone one of _your_ secrets instead. thoughts?  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: actually the first idea was fine, please go ahead. I'm all ears, hee!  
dont talk to me #4213: thats what i thought.  
dont talk to me #4213: ok so. the official line is that he just wanted a change, but i know the real reason...  
dont talk to me #4213: he kept getting caught dancing to the price of doing business, so it had to go. he has a _reputation_ to _maintain._  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: wait for real? huh... didn't think he was _capable_ of having hobbies...  
dont talk to me #4213: yeah thats exactly what he wants you to think.  
Treasure Knight #9999: Please, Specter Knight. I need you to stop airing my dirty laundry like this. I am willing to make a deal, if you'll just stay silent... - Treasure Knight  
dont talk to me #4213: what will you give me...  
Treasure Knight #9999: The... satisfaction of diminishing my life's work for your own sick humour? - Treasure Knight  
dont talk to me #4213: mmmmno, youre gonna have to sweeten the pot a little there!  
>Treasure Knight #9999: Very well, how about this: I will let you bring your own container and you may fill it up with _anything you want_ from my vault. Does that sound amenable to you? - Treasure Knight  
dont talk to me #4213: oh _now_ were cooking!  
dont talk to me #4213: for anyone else looking to make me shut up, _that_ is how you ensure my silence! not to quote king knight, but _take notes!_  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: you're dead! you can't eat, you only wear one set of clothes... what do you even need treasure for, hee?  
dont talk to me #4213: ...  
dont talk to me #4213: some habits are... hard to break.  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: at some point i'm gonna sit all of you down and _make_ you explain your tragic backstories so specter and polar can't just keep saying cryptic shit like that with no explanation. it'll be a service to the community.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> treasure knight's tts software is appropriately nautical themed


	5. ages and ages

Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Honestly, I miss the Glidewing a little. The ship itself. Not most of the people on board.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: If you fell just right off the back of the upper deck, there was a one man ship you would land in! Ah, I had such fun pretending to drive it...  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: what?  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: how old are you???  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Why, I'm 23 years young! Quite a tender age to be such an illustrious king, if I do say so myself...  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: hey... I'm 23!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: What?  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: No, no, no, no!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: This is terrible! I can't be the same age as you!   
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: not like I can change the time I was born...  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Ugh, can't you?  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Alright, here's what we're going to do. You're going to pretend to be a year younger, and we will never speak of this again.  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: but that's stupid! why do _I_ have to be the younger one! why can't it be you? you're childish enough for it, hee hee!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: It just makes more sense this way. It's impossible that anyone would actually believe _you're_ older than me!   
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: I'm turning 24 in 3 months anyway, so I doubt you actually _are_ older than me. All I'm saying is you should pretend the age gap is wider than it is! Surely even you can grasp a concept as simple as that, hm?  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: I...   
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: first of all, _I'm_ a scientist, and _you're_ a moron who just happens to be worryingly good at a card game, so don't act like _I'm_ the one who can't grasp simple concepts here. second of all, _my_ birthday is next _week_ , hee hee! if you're such a genius, what does that make you?  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: What?  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: No. No, that can't be right!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: That doesn't make sense! You can't be older than me! How are you older than me!  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: probably because I was born before you, smartguy! hee hee hee!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: This is disgusting. I hate this. I want to push my birthday forward.   
dont talk to me #4213: dont go wishing your life away.  
dont talk to me #4213: you never know. any day could be your last.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Is there a point to this idle postulation, or are you just trying to reach your pessimism quota for the day? I have bigger problems to deal with than you, you know!  
dont talk to me #4213: all im saying is, some of us died at 27.   
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: and all _I'm_ saying is, some of us don't have time for your eternal sadness! If I were in your position, I'd be treating it as a new start, not wallowing in my upset like you are!  
dont talk to me #4213: i have an _extremely_ hard time believing youd be doing any better than i am in my role.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Well, I don't!  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: WHOA YOU GUYS ARE INFANTS  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: WHO THE FUCK LET YOU BE EVIL  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: I WOULDNT LET ANYONE BELOW 30 OPERATE A DRILL, LET ALONE A KINGDOM  
dont talk to me #4213: most people dont have the benefit of workers who are literal thousands of years old, but feel free to continue soapboxing.  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: COOL I WILL  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: oh boy, this again. he got on my case about it last time too, hee! it's really grating!  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: HEY I JUST THINK YOURE A LITTLE YOUNG TO HAVE MULTIPLE DEGREES IS ALL  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: How old are _you_ then, Mr. Chief Adult of Adulthood?  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: HEY WATCH THE MOUTH, IVE GOT 21 YEARS ON YOU, TINY  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111:Ugh, you're going to make me do _mathematics_ to find out? This is truly a terrible day...  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: I...  
Mole Chief of Minecraft #6626: IM 45...  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: There! That wasn't so hard, was it?  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: hey i think you guys are the youngest members of the order!  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: What about Propeller Knight?  
la rose de la ciel 🌹 #6969: Don't you know it's rude to ask a pilot their age? All you need to know is that I am dashing, carefree, and _very_ eligible... ;)  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: I DONT NEED TO KNOW HOW OLD HE IS TO KNOW _HES_ NOT QUALIFIED TO OPERATE A DRILL  
Treasure Knight #9999: Hm. Is it possible to have multiple ages at once? - Treasure Knight  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: WHAT  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: ... NO???  
Treasure Knight #9999: Ah. I suppose I'll have to narrow it down to one, then. This may take some time. - Treasure Knight  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: if... if it helps, it's generally the largest amount of years?  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!!#6626: do you not... know how aging works?   
Treasure Knight #9999: Rest assured, I am fully aware of how aging works. It is simply a difficult process for me to narrow down which one people are hoping to know. In all honesty, no one has asked. - Treasure Knight  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: Well, good news everyone! Treasure Knight is immortal or a collective of shadowy investors or something, so while we _are_ most likely going to be at his financial mercy until the end of time, at least we're going to be getting paid forever!  
Treasure Knight #9999: I prefer the term, 'Board of Directors', though you're not far off. Now, if nobody minds, I will be getting back to my work. If you have any further questions, I'm afraid I don't have the time to answer them. - Treasure Knight  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: no wait, come back! I need to know how you can have multiple ages! please, I've dedicated my life to knowing what would otherwise be unknown! you _have_ to tell me, hee!   
tinker fortress 2 #1001: he's not online anymore bud.  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM! #8787: DAMN!!!  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: hee, this is the worst! I hate being curious about something that won't get answered, hee hee!  
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: ooh, maybe I'll go break into his ship to ask him or something! can't avoid an awkward conversation when the person asking is heavily armed, hee hee!  
dont talk to me #4213: speaking from experience, you probably dont want to do that. by which i mean i dont want to be the one cleaning whats left of you off the iron whales walls.  
Your ~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: He was so much faster than I was expecting him to be...   
HEE HEE HEE! BOOM!!! #8787: ... maybe later, then.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that treasure knight thing might come up again. it'll probably come up again. the concept it goes with is my favourite headcanon for him so it'll probably pop up sooner or later. polar knight didn't talk in this one because he saw how young some of his coworkers were and got sad about his deeply fractured family.


	6. nitro fightro

Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: HEY IVE BEEN MEANING TO ASK  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: WHATS WITH THE NUMBERS?  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: discord assigns each user a 4 digit number  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: YEAH YEAH I KNOW THAT  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: I MEAN YOUR NUMBERS. YOU GUYS. SPECIFICALLY. WHY ARE YOUR NUMBERS ALL SO FITTING? WHATS WITH THAT?  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: it's... a function of discord nitro?  
❄️ #4246: fuck is nitro?  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: … ok i prob should have seen this coming for polar  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: but mole? really?  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: LOOK IM A BUSY GUY I DONT HAVE THE TIME OR MONEY TO PAY FOR SOME PREMIUM SERVICE ON A PLATFORM THAT FUNCTIONS FINE ANYWAY!  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: IM JUST BEING PRAGMATIC!  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: he doesn't even have nitro... :pensive:  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: AT LEAST USE THE ACTUAL MEME YOU ASSHOLE  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: i only have it as an emote from another server  
tinker fortress 2 #1001: you know, that thing you can't do?  
Your~Rightful Ruler~ #1111: HAH! LOOK, THEY'RE USING THE PEASANT'S DISCORD!  
Treasure Knight #9999: What do you _mean_ , you ‘don’t have the money’? We have an _express agreement_ that all landlocked riches belong to you! You have enough money to buy Nitro for your entire dig crew! - Treasure Knight  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: RUNNING AN EXCAVATION OF THIS SIZE TAKES SOME SERIOUS FUNDS ESPECIALLY WHEN PEOPLE KEEP BREAKING INTO YOUR DIG SITE AND STEALING!  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: SORRY THAT IM MAKING SENSIBLE FINANCIAL DECISIONS!   
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: NONE OF YOU COULD LAST A WEEK DOING MY JOB   
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: HONESTLY.  
Treasure Knight #9999: You know, some of us just _admit_ when we’re being a cheapskate. - Treasure Knight  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: MAYBE ILL COME AND BREAK INTO YOUR HOUSE AND STEAL YOUR STUFF FOR A CHANGE  
Mole, Chief of Minecraft #6626: HOWS THAT SOUND YOU SMUG BASTARD  
The One You Kneel For #0000: I _was_ wondering why the server didn't have 8 Nitro boosts. I intended to bring it up at the next order meeting, during the weekly insubordination talk... : enchantressthoughtful:  
dont talk to me #4213: pfft. insubordination check!  
The One You Kneel For #0000: _You’re_ about to receive an insubordination check in a second if you do not return to your duties. I can _see_ you playing online joustus.   
dont talk to me #4213: oh fuck.  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i need you to imagine mole knight, in the middle of a crowded dig site, angrily texting at the speed of light because his break will be over in a couple of minutes and he NEEDS to win this argument. also the enchantress has nitro but she doesn't boost the order server as a show of dominance.

**Author's Note:**

> this is basically an excuse for me to figure out my knight characterisations while having fun. I may add more to this, depending on what I have the inspiration for


End file.
